Inspired by this gem.
Hi, me.
Hi, mommy.
Where my vroom wewwow?
Where's Cruz, the yellow car from Cars?
I wanna pee-pee bon-bon green.
I will sit on the potty for ten seconds in exchange for a green gummy bear. If you are all out of green, I will accept another color, but only after loudly voicing my dissatisfaction.
Poop is coming!
I'm pooping. Hold my hands while I squeeze my legs straight together and make pained expressions in order to drag this out as long as possible.
I wanna peep.
I want pink toenail polish like yours, mommy.
No wanna boing-boing.
I don't want to go to gymnastics class.
No wanna wee-oh!
I don't want to wear those stupid fireman pajamas you got me for Halloween, and will fight to the death to not let them touch my body. I am not a goddamn fireman, I am a fireman enthusiast. Just put on one of my three firetruck-motif outfits already and we can both move past this.
I froid (pronounced fwah, meaning "cold" in French).
Cuddle with me. You are paying too much attention to that baby and I've had enough.
Papa, bébé, bras! (bras = arms)
Give the baby to daddy. You are paying too much attention to it and I've had enough.
Bébé not happy!
The baby is crying.
Bébé happy!
The baby is smiling.
I want lait.
I want milk.
Papa chien (dog) wuf-wuf.
Daddy, let's go on a walk and check out the neighborhood dogs.
I peur (fear) chien.
I'm afraid of dogs.
Meemo.
Finding Nemo.
Seeee dooooow!
Swim down! (Reenacting a dramatic scene from Finding Nemo)
Guitare.
Coco.
Grrrrrr.
The Lion King.
Grrrrrr.
Dinosaur.
Grrrrrr.
Tiger.
Scary dauphin (dolphin).
Shark.